Thursday, August 20, 2015

Work for travel instead of travel for work

wow its been almost 2 years since I'm not posting anything here since i start to work seriously since 2 years ago & don't have time to blog.

I feel i have grow as person for that period of time & i had travelled to a few countries & had been exposed to the 'outside' world. Its always been my dream to travel the world & since I'm young I always thought of studying oversea but i never know how to. But now i absolutely don't want that anymore. Doing research ? that would be hell. Haha. Anyway, I thought the only way for me to get to travel is by saving money. People said u will never know ur luck. Then i got this job where i get the chance to travel the world even some of the places u never thought of going. Of course I'm not in the tourism industry or things like that. There's a lot of stories i can share about those places in this blog but yeah then again i don't have time to do that.

The way u view life is difference when u get to see the world. Well anyway its depends on what type person u are too. Of course different people have different things that they wanna do or achieved in life. Some people think they want to be rich & some want to have a their own family etc. I can be a bit 'hippie' sometimes. Just laid back (I'm totally like this before &i know its not that healthy). I don't think much about the standard way of living like the rest of the people. To have that standard life or timeline made me feel trapped & not being myself. I know a lot people will judge me for this. why u don't buy a house? why u don't get married? why & why & why.  SO there are a lot of why. Screw those judgmental people.  I know I'm a late starter but well thats my life anyway.

Monday, April 8, 2013

Master Degree?? is it worth it?

My answer:

Not worth it..but for my personal satisfaction and achievement, worth it. This answer is not for people who've been sponsored by a university to further their studies to be a lecturer (well they already got the job so no fuss). My studies sponsored by a combination of 3: myself, my dad & MOHE. Some of my friends have express their interest to further studies before so i guess maybe some peeps out there might have the same question too & have difficult time to decide..so (again) this is what i think from my own experience. Before that i wanna tell u my story..the reason why i further my studies is because i don't get any job other than a job as a temporary teacher (good salary with no future no guarantee unless if u really wanna be a school teacher - mind u controlling 13-17 years old students is very difficult plus i was assign to teach some (most) class which consist of studs that have discipline problems). Half day work good salary  etc etc..nah..it is a very tough job..i went back home still feeling stressful..that's the prize. Ok get back to the subject..and another reason why i further my studies is because i wanna get my freedom back. I won't elaborate on tht anyway..haha! I'm more than a half-way through  my studies when i start to realize i might have made a mistake. The time that i'm about to do my thesis is the time when i realize about it.. I have difficult time finishing my thesis and getting out-of -focus and waste a lot of my time doing something else...and money wasted.

So my advice is Further ur studies only when u r really interested in it..if u r not sure..u better don't. A Master Degree won't really help u to get a job..matter of fact i was unemployed for a few months and work as a sales girl (life is difficult) before i was landed a job..and another..all using my degree..here in my place they r not looking at my master so of course no ''master salary''. but a master degree is good for people who live near to big big company that give u big big salary. A master degree will not be a guarantee for u to be a lecturer either bcos i know a lot of people who didn't get this job..except if u wanna be a lecturer in small or medium or known-unknown private college which is hmm. if u wanna get a Phd which of course via a master degree, then i encourage u to further ur studies..very few people have Phd so ur chance to be a star out there is very bright (most probably). But before u do..prepare urself mentally first because it will consume a lot of ur time, ur energy & ur money.



Tuesday, March 26, 2013

le life is wonderful

I like it this moment..'a non stressful life'..i feel happy.i'm quiet..i'm relaxing..reading novels**....listening to peaceful soothing songs.watching reality tv show...do YouTube marathon-ing new songs old songs; ed sheeran, nina simone, janis joplin (i'm hunger for soul..i mean soul songs) etc etc..wikipedia-ing here and there about almost anything (i have big curiosity but i don't like to be curious about ordinary life of other people around me) mainly about singers..trying new recipe..haha...i'm not thinking..i mean not thinking much about anything..a bliss..apart from the time when my mom or dad noising around..anyway of course i couldn't have this kinda life forever..soon my money would become less and less.like that story with the title 'lotus eater'..a classic story..did u read that?? not a good example..but i have similar thoughts like that poor guy sometimes..maybe this is another sign of my weirdness-es .second anyway, i guess soon i'll be bored..i need  to kick my arse to get moving..now maybe not yet..unless if some rich fella offer me some good money for me to do my own version of  '100 things that i will do before i die'. I'll definitely make my own list and take that chance!!


**i'm not really into reading novels in the past...my early years of reading novels is during my teenage years where i read this mystery crime solving novel by few kids.a novel series.it is a classic written in the 70's..the book even looks so antique..i forgot the title..it's like 14-15 years ago and another novel written in malay....then after my 20's (before i became a keen reader)...i finish 2 novels..1 is about an indian girl force to married young (i still can remember that story till now *mind u i have some issues with remembering stuff*.. .i try to find good novels after that but failed..so i stop reading for few years) and another 1 is ''the da vinci code' the famous 1 that most peeps have already read..and now a bookshop have become a fun place for me..not that i read the whole book in the bookshop..i just read synopsis at the back..and decide whether i wanna buy it or not..well i'm not rich so i can't buy book easily..i just buy if the price is quite cheap and reasonable..or if they have this mega discount sale..

Monday, January 14, 2013

Am I weird?


Hi..I am 27 years old going 28 this year..I have no job..no money..I'm single and I don't know what to do with my life ..I did almost 7 different jobs for the past 4 years including some odd jobs..During my secondary school time, I am always at the top of my class..no. 1 ..get good results..I study hard until I lost some of my vision..I have big ambition...My childhood ambition is to be an astronomer..I know rite..we don't  even have astronomy here in Malaysia..but yeah I don't know what to do with that ambition of mine.so here i am..now..Some people think that they are not lucky enough but i guess they did miss something there..OK..i know what u are thinking..I'm not trying to sounds pathetic or sounds like a loser or anything..I just wanna write..I love writing..not that sort of writing.I don't like academic writing..Its killing me...I mean this kinda writing..expressive writing..but I can't be a writer because I always lost my idea somewhere in the middle..Yeah i know maybe i'm not trying that hard bla bla bla..It's not exactly true..the truth is I'm not sure what i wanna do with my life..but if people give me opportunity maybe i might give them my best...anyway. i just wish my future employer didn't read this..ha ha..one word that people always use to describe me is ''weird''..be it old friends..new friends..the word never change :D..honestly, i take that as a compliment..that's mean I'm unique and different! Especially the way I think maybe..i don't know..I'm not really sure what is the real definition of being normal..I have nothing to write anymore..so that's it :D

Sunday, December 23, 2012

counting days for 2012 to end!


oh wow.time passed by so fast...i still remember the end of 2011 quite well..and now we almost come to the end of 2012...can't hardly wait for it..well actually it doesn't mean that much anyway just the change of  number  from 2 to 3..however..next year would be different for me..so yeah..that's why..that's my goal...do different things each year..talking about 2012..i love 2012! it's been a great and happening year for me but a bit bitter too at the same time.especially at the beginning of the year and some part of other months that i couldn't mention here...i wish i can forget some part of 2012 out of my my mind and memories..and born as a new person..in memories-wise...hahaha....i managed to change my way of thinking and my personality a bit or more (not sure the scale) for the past 4-5 years ..i'm not sure  whether i can change my attitude or personality again..modified it a bit here and there..just wait for my ideas to come..i don't wanna think about it..i guess people see me as a happy person..and other people will realize immediately if  '' i'm not happy''..actually.. originally i'm not that kinda person..totally the opposite..i never really smile to other people even towards people that i know and i'm quite passive.it's more to my inner shyness (my made up words..haha) conflict..i don't really talk to people and i don't have interest talking with other people..tapi itu dulu..i realized that it's not a good attitude and i have to change for myself too..and now i have changed ! :D ..maybe not totally but up to better scale :D ..and one more thing..negativity..i can't live with it..it is something that have to kick out like a disease...if i don't do that..u'll definitely see the different hidden side of me..scary and full of unspoken rage inside of me which come out once in a while if i accidentally think too much  .that's why i have to live to not to think too much about unnecessary stuff..believe me..it is really really bad..and thinking in the sense of mind-reading is one of the worst activity ever and i try to avoid that too..it is very very tiring..we are not superhuman who can read other people mind..but we love to do that weren't we?

Friday, October 26, 2012

before sunrise, before sunset and before midnight

Don't get too excited. This have nothing to do with my life. hahaha.
It is just the name of a movie and its sequel. Just search it on  IMDB or wikipedia. Well, i never really watch the first movie (before sunrise) and still don't have chance to do so till now..sob sob..It's a great movie. I already watched it 3 times and cried each time. I planned to watch it again later. I truly deeply love it. Before sunrise (1995), before sunset (2004). The sequel is made after 9 years of the first movie and they did grow old in the movie which makes the story very realistic. The story start with Jesse (Ethan Hawke) talking about his new novel which based on his time spent with Celine (Julie Delphy) in Paris. This very first part really pulling me in to keep on watching. Before sunset is all talk with no hugging, kissing etc. Not your typical romance drama. Just talk. Unlike most ''all talk'' movies, this movie is not boring and very emotional and i love the brilliant script. It makes me feel like i'm a third person eavesdrop their conversation. Anyway, most people including me myself found that the taxi scene is the most emotional scene in this movie. My tears flow like a heavy rain hahahha. The fact that they express their feeling towards each other but at the same time they already have their own partner who they don't love, really broke my heart. Jesse married to a woman he impregnated and Celine being with someone who rarely spend time with her. If your life is kinda related to this story u will feel more sad and hurtful. Ok..enough of the sad part. My favorite scene is when Celine dance to Nina Simone song, gosh..it just so sexy and cute! and then she said ''baby u are gonna miss that plane''. Epic.


Oh i'm so much anticipated to watch before sunset sequel called Before Midnight (2013). The scene was shot in Greece. I wonder what will happen. I read somewhere that there are possibility that before midnight will be the last movie and they are getting back together..Please please let it happen. Finger-crossed for it!!

Before Midnight